I don’t care who did the breaking up, whether you broke up with them or they broke up with you. I don’t care what the break up was blamed on. No matter what the breaker uppers says, the real reason you’re not together anymore is because one could not see themselves having a future with the other. So, it’s time to move on and start a new chapter. Not texting your ex is hard especially if it just happened. The first quiet morning your phone doesn’t ding with a “Good Morning” text you might just cry. No doubt you’ll still be raiding the Chive and come across memes your Ex would love, and you’ll think these be a great ice breaker to gauge their interest in a reconciliation- Don’t Do it!! Loneliness and post break up anxiety comes in waves and you may find yourself feeling panicked and thinking now’s a good time to text them asking how they are Don’t Do it!! I’ve never seen anything good come out of maintaining a “textship” with an ex. You’re amazing and your time is valuable so spend it engaging with people who have a positive impact on your life. Don’t text your ex! Do some of these things instead when you get the Urge 😉
1. Post on instagram– All those pictures, memes and cute selfies you want to send to your ex to “make them want you back” are just going to make them feel like they’re #winning because if they still wanted you they could have you. Whether you know it in that moment or not you deserve better. Exes have a tendency to keep each other in their back pocket. Even if they have no intentions of hanging out or reconciling they’ll still text you to ask how you are. When they do this they are bored and testing to see if they can still get a response. You deserve better. All your friendships and relationships should be with people who genuinely care for you. When you have the urge to send your ex images just post those to your Instagram instead. I actually have done this in the past and it felt good because someone still (virtually) laughed with me and that’s all I really wanted.
2. Write- Journaling is good for the soul. I promise you it feels amazing to take all those crazy, mixed emotions out of your head and lay them out on paper. If your ex hurt you there’s a chance you’re going to want to either A) hurt them back by pointing out what a horrible person they are and how they mistreated you or 2) get them to apologize for hurting you. There’s a popular saying on Pinterest that “Life Becomes Easier When You Accept the Apology You Never Got” and it is absolutely true. Besides journaling you can write your ex a letter detailing all the hurt and pain they caused you. Once you have the letter written seal it up or leave it in a drawer- definitely don’t mail it. It just feels good to process emotions and get them out of your system.
3. Paint your nails or detail your car- I’ve got some men in the audience so I made sure to include something you could apply to your life as well. I don’t know very many people who keep up with their nails or car 100% of the time, so when you get lonely and want to text your ex focus your energy on something that makes you feel good about yourself and your presentation to the world. Even when you’re a mess on the inside you can still look put together for the world, and manicured nails and a clean car are two small pieces of the puzzle.
4. vent to your best friend- Best friends are awesome and another form of soul mates. When you want to text your ex I guarantee you your best friend will be there the listen. Try meeting up with them for coffee or a beer. There’s something about spending time with a best friend and getting things off your chest with them that makes you feel better. Probably because of all the laughing you also tend to do with your best friend.
5. cook or bake- I suggest these hobbies because they’re time consuming and you can never truly run out of ideas. Not to mention it’s rewarding to your belly. You can create a Pinterest account if you haven’t already and get TONS of inspiration. I think I have like 300 recipes pinned but I’ve tried less than 10.
6. Hike– Get outside! You may be surprised to find that there’s waterfalls, fire towers or gorgeous overlooks in your area that you didn’t even know existed! Hiking is also the perfect distraction from texting your ex because there’s a good chance you won’t have cell service anyway. It’s also a form of exercise and you remember what Elle Woods from Legally blonde said about exercise, right? Exercise releases endorphins and endorphins make you happy. Happy people don’t text their ex 😀
7. Use Google- You may convince yourself you HAVE to text your ex for information. Information like directions, a song title or advice but chances are you can find whatever you’re looking for on Google. Everyone knows what happens when you get on Google, anyway. You may start off googling “Taylor Swift Song Lyrics” but 30 minutes later you’re reading a news article about a cannibal in Milwaukee while watching a YouTube video of a corgi shaking it’s butt to a rap song. Texting your ex has long left your mind.
I purposely left 8,9, and 10 off because I’d rather get my readers opinions and help in finishing the list. Blogs are so much more fun when they’re interactive. Leave your comment below numbered appropriately. In fact, if you have a really good idea and 8, 9 and 10 are already done go ahead and we’ll work towards 11, 12 and 13 😀